Thank you God for waiting for me patiently even though i’m still taking my time to know u better. I am not the best nor the most faithful but You love me the same.
on sunday, someone sat me down and spoke to me rather randomly. Random to me, but i think it was really God’s plan. I tried hard to be nice and to understsnd what was being said to me. Then the inevitable topic was approached. I must say, this is the first time someone actually asked me about it explicitly. So odd. But anyway, what was told to me was unlike what i have heard. The things people have said to me revolve around the same few things. But this was different. But i feel i need to stand firm on my decision for now. Which is to move away. I cannot explain in detail to anyone what exactly happened except for 1 person. But no body will really know why i am so affected even though i shouldn’t be. I dont know how this whole thing will pan out week or months down the road. I just dont think i am in any position to do anything anymore. I think i have said and done enough. I dont know really know what God wants me to do about this. To be honest, more than anything else, i want answers and explanations. But i suppose now is not the right time. The time might never come. I am quite tired of putting my emotions out there risking to be trampled on. So i think trying to stay strong is a better bet. That’s why i think i shy away from digging deeper into God’s word. Because i fear He will ask me to do the unthinkable. I hope i’ll have faith to trust more.
But anyway, i think the best thing i can do for myself is to better myself. To learn to love myself. So the past few days, i have been trying to be disciplined in my exercise. Also for the past week of crazy eating. Gosh. So far, im pleased with my determination. I am not seeing much results probably cos of what i ate last week, but i will try not to focus too much on being skinny or losing weight, but on focusing on a healthy lifestyle in general. I thank God for giving me added strength on my run earlier on today. For giving me that breeze of cool air when i took the longer route.
Im really tired. Time for bed (:
My mom only touches the dogs when she goes out to throw rubbish -.- this is her patting Rusty boy. Hehe
We also celebrated my grandfather’s birthday on sunday. We also had a game of bowling as a big family. It was something different and so fun! Loved it!
Met up with yuhui to catch up on life. Her relationship is such a good example of how a Christian relationship should me. Means there is hope for me in future. HAHAH
Hehehe. Look at his teeth! I love my dogs. Need i say more?